Make me Laugh – Show me the FUNNY!

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Comment by Michael Ratliff on September 24, 2009 at 10:15am

12 great tech cartoons: http://www.pcworld.com/article/172091/12_terrific_tech_cartoons.html

Comment by Michael Ratliff on September 23, 2009 at 1:46pm

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

Comment by Cissi Sherlock on September 22, 2009 at 3:36pm

Amy J. Powers, I'm still telling your joke!

Comment by Cissi Sherlock on September 22, 2009 at 12:00pm

I know you don't clean your computer screen very often and it is hard to do the inside, so here is my present to you.

Click "here" for your gift!

Comment by Cissi Sherlock on September 22, 2009 at 3:24am

Comment by Cissi Sherlock on September 22, 2009 at 2:42am

Comment by Cissi Sherlock on September 22, 2009 at 1:19am

It's not difficult to make a woman happy.

A man only needs to be:

1. A friend
2. A companion
3. A lover
4. A brother
5. A father
6. A master
7. A chef
8. An electrician
9. A carpenter
10. A plumber
11. A mechanic
12. A decorator
13. A stylist
14. A sexologist
15. A gynecologist
16. A psychologist
17. A pest exterminator
18. A psychiatrist
19. A healer
20. A good listener
21. An organizer
22. A good father
23. Very clean
24. Sympathetic
25. Athletic
26. warm
27. Attentive
28. Gallant
29. Intelligent
30. Funny
31. Creative
32. Tender
33. Strong
34. Understanding
35. Tolerant
36. Prudent
37. Ambitious
38. Capable
39. Courageous
40. Determined
41. True
42. Dependable
43. Passionate
44. Compassionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. Give her compliments regularly
46. Love shopping
47 Be honest
48. be very rich
49. Not stress her out
50. Not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
54. Never to forget:
* Birthdays
* Anniversaries
* Arrangements she makes

>
HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1 Show up naked

2. Bring alcohol

Comment by Cissi Sherlock on September 22, 2009 at 1:15am

Friends

None of that 'Sis'-sy Stuff
Are you tired of those
sissy 'friendship' poems
that always sound good,
but never actually come close
to reality?
Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of
True Friendship.
You WON'T see
cutesy little smiley faces
on this card-
Just the stone cold truth
of our great friendship.

1. When you are sad,
I will jump on the person
who made you sad
like a spider monkey
jacked up on Mountain Dew!!!


2. When you are blue,
I will try to dislodge
whatever is choking you.


3. When you smile,
I will know you are
plotting something
that I must be involved in.


4. When you're scared,
we will high tail it out of here.


5. When you are worried,
I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse
it could be until you
quit whining, ya big baby!!!!


6. When you are confused,
I will use little words.


7. When you are sick,
Stay away from me
until you are well again.
I don't want whatever you have...


8. When you fall,
I'll pick you up
and dust you off--
After I laugh my rear off!!


9. This is my oath...
I pledge it to the end.
'Why?' you may ask;
-- because you are my FRIEND!
***********************
Friendship is like peeing your pants,
everyone can see it,
but only YOU
can feel the
true warmth.
**********************
Try sending this to
10
of your closest friends ..
including the person
who sent this to you ...
Then, get depressed
'cause you can only think of 4!

Comment by Cissi Sherlock on September 22, 2009 at 12:46am

DEAR DIARY: DAY 1 - All packed for the cruise ship - all my sexiest
dresses and make-up. Really excited.

DEAR DIARY: DAY 2 - Entire day at sea, beautiful and saw whales and
dolphins. Met the Captain today - seems a very nice man.

DEAR DIARY: DAY 3 - At the pool today. Also some shuffle boarding and
hit golf balls off the deck. Captain invited me to join him at his
table for dinner. Felt honored and had a wonderful time. He is very
attractive and attentive.

DEAR DIARY: DAY 4 - Won $800 in the ship's casino. Captain asked me
to have dinner with him in his own cabin. Had a luxurious meal complete
with caviar and champagne. He asked me to stay the night but I
declined.. Told him I could not be unfaithful to my husband.

DEAR DIARY: DAY 5 - Pool again today, got sun burnt, and went inside
to drink at piano bar for rest of day. Captain saw me, bought me
several large drinks. Really is charming.. Again asked me to visit his
cabin for the night. Again I declined. He told me if I did not let
him have his way with me he would sink the ship.. I was shocked.

DEAR DIARY: DAY 6 - Today I saved 1,600 lives. Twice!

Comment by Cissi Sherlock on September 21, 2009 at 10:46pm

Amy!

I cracked up!

I love It!!!!!!

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